OK, not the song — although it’s freakin’ awesome. No, today I have climate change on my mind.
Relax, Al Gore-ophobes. Think back, 30-somethings. Remember when school DIDN’T start in August? When June, July and August were sacrosanct? Then, in the last days of August you got ready for school again.
Off to the T.G. & Y. to get fresh crayons, and those crappy scissors that hurt your hands because the handles were bare metal. The smell of fresh No. 2 pencils, wax of those crayons, Big Chief tablets, and that overall fresh, clean smell you got off the brand newness of your bag-o-supplies. Everything was fresh and new – sure, they weren’t toys, but it was neat new stuff, and you had a lot of em. The best part? Representin’ with cool folders or lunchboxes which said “Hell yeah I rock the M.A.S.K. team on my plastic lunchbox” or, if you’re really old, your metal ’82 G.I. Joe lunchbox (me). Pretty much if you got toys or a show on your folder, it meant you are WAY into it. So a 99 cent folder was a way of proving your loyalty to Joe collecting analagous to owning the USS FLagg in your room.
What does this have to do with anything?
Climate change, I guess. Remember what clothes you used to get to go back to school? FALL CLOTHES. I remember the smell of the wall of denim in Anthony’s, getting new jeans I would wear the knees out of, and the eventual trip to Sears where I would get Izod (with the Lacoste alligator!) shirts, polos etc.
The point is, it wasn’t freakin’ hot when it was time to go back to school. I have pictures of me in a shirt and sweater vest for the first day (shut up, I was a kid and did not dress myself.) I mean, when you started school, it was beginning to cool off. Pretty much what we had was one month of warm to cooling weather that was crazy nice to walk to school in. And what came after the month of getting used to your new routine for third grade?
The countdown to Halloween. From your friends to everyone you knew, discussion quickly turned to who you would go as. Back in the day, when you went to a store, the main draw was the toy aisle, maybe the comic rack (long gone now!), and lastly the candy aisle. But NOW, for a whole MONTH, was a giant section of awesome stuff to eat, wear, and decorate with. Every trip to the dime store (as my Grandma called it) was special. You had to know who you were going to be! Being a HUGE vampire, fan, 90% of the time I was Dracula. Not sure about the other times, but if I wasn’t Dracula, it was a big deal.
What does all this rambling mean? I’m ready for the countdown to Halloween, but it’s too darn hot to feel like fall. Thanks to climate change or whatever it is, the season never feels like it should when it should like 25 years ago. I bet it will be hot as Hades in Oklahoma, and it will ruin my Halloween. All I need is 8 weeks of occasional cold fronts people.
Is that so hard?
(Last question for comments: do you guys wanna see more pictures in posts? Does it help? Is this blog to cerebral in asking you to see the word pictures instead of actual crap from eBay? Let me know.)